Governors have gotten liberal with the tyranny this year. The further left your governor, the more tyrannical and arbitrary his lockdown restrictions. Chances are if you live in one of these states, you’ve called your governor a douchebag. Possibly a douchecanoe. Doucheburger with cheese is another option. As long as that one keyword is there, possibilities are endless. Particularly in states like New York and California. Comedian Ryan Long agrees. He reimagines these governors as the actual biggest douchebags you know. Ever wonder what it would be like if your least favorite tyrants got together to crush White Claws? It might go a little something like this.
My man nails the essence of Andrew Cuomo here.
Governors Give New Lock-down Restrictions from Houseparty
My two favorite lines:
“If you have any doubts that this is important, here’s some graphs and sh*t.” – Gov. Andrew Cuomo
“Give me the shoe polish!” – Gov. Ralph Northam
Missing from this sketch is Mayor Bill de Blasio. Who, on Monday, told New York City to prepare for another full shutdown. That’s right. Bill de Blasio is such a giant douchebag, no one wants to even pretend to hang out with him. Either that or de Blasio was out getting his shine box for Cuomo.
Another possibility is he was forced to sit outside with the guy playing L.A. Mayor Eric Garcetti. Only statewide executives allowed! The governors might all be horrible human beings who suck at life, but they still have some standards.
Can You Talk Politics in 2020? | Louder With Crowder
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